CruuuciaL :3

The hardest part in reviewing is not the part when you're answering tons of questionnaires. It's when you see your friends having the time of their lives and you're stuck at home with so much to do, it's when your all-time favorite movie is on TV and you just can't watch, it's when your family go out of town and you can't go with them, it's when you have SO MANY things in mind and you just can't actualize them YET because you're reviewing. Most of my co-reviewees had it coming. I didn't.

Lord, I need you. Help me. Please?

At the "Spurs" of the moment :')

A whole lot of pressure has built up in me ever since day one of the review started. And here I am right now, stealing away time to write this entry in my blog for the team who has shown me so much in such a short span of time—about 2 hours, barely.

I am a Miami Heat HATER. Like yea, I’d go for any team but not Heat. Perhaps, in such rare cases, first impressions last, and this group of players (I refuse to call them a team) has shown me how dysfunctional an NBA “group of players” can be if you take away their top three players. For that matter, let’s call them the big three. Ever since I saw how savagely aggressive the players were, I never lifted the hostile prejudice I had for this “group of players.” It began when they faced the ever-glorious no-rebounder, shoot-it-all-you-can offensive team Dallas Mavericks in 2011. Thank God, they won! It grew bigger when the Heat won in 2012 championship against Oklahoma. ASDFGHJKL oh, by the way, I’m not a die-hard NBA audience but I always make it a point to watch every finals series annually.

This year, I think my Heat enmity blues has just gotten worse. Not that I admit they’re way better that the team I was referring to in the introductory paragraph, but because by taking down “that” team in game6, I just felt how vulnerable I am as well in my “basketball” life. (let’s get back to that later)

So this team I’m referring to; this veteran-oh-so-classic-give-it-your-all team is also called the San Antonio Spurs. I’ve seen this team play about them 10 years ago, when my elder brother and my dad would change the TV channel from MY channel to the NBA channel (which used to piss me off). Aaaawww, had I known how cool it is to actually see these people rock the basketball court, I would have been the one who’d switch the channel with my own hand! Anyhow, what I’m trying to point out is that, this team has already made their way claiming their own birthright in the NBA epic history. The thing about this team is, they really are a TEAM. They work together, and putting the lead players on the bench for a break won’t change the spirit in them. This entry won’t be enough to tell you guys how this team has sent chills in my nerves and how their skip-a-heartbeat execution has taught me so much, not just about basketball, but even more so, about life.

It was not until game 6 that I have come to appreciate the legends in this team. Unlike any other situation when I get hooked in a basketball team because there’s this hot player, this time, I super duper love Spurs because I HONESTLY and UNBELIEVABLY fell for the entire team and the coach, Mr. Popovich, has earned my respect. :’) AAWWW.

And because I love this team so much, I’m gonna do a rough run through for each of my favorite players:

Tony Parker. He’s made up of 100% Flash, 50% James Bond, and 50% Josh Duhamel which makes him a 200% all-time minute-to-win-it Spurs asset. You think the game’s over? THINK AGAIN. For as long as he’s on the court and he’s not injured whatsoever, you’d have to wait for the clock to go 00.00 to make sure it’s the end. :D

Tim Duncan. He’s the coolest of them all. I mean, this guy has got the word “chillax” all over his body and I haven’t seen him shout, freak out, or go wild like Donald Duck (HAHA) anyhow, this player plays classic. I like the way he does the assists and the way he fouls pathetic players is way more than awesome! By the way, he lives by his name. He dunks well. Effortless. ;)

Manu Ginobili. Assists, lay-ups, and wild goose chasin’ with all the “you-can’t-get-this-ball-off-my-hands-over-my-dead-body” moves, this guy sure is a one of the players to look up to in this team. :3 And oh, by the way, you pronounce it as JI-NO-BLI. Just like that! :3

Danny Green. This guy is the type of player you woudn't want to see near the three-point line. He has made history for himself this finals for being the only one (so far) with the most number of THREE-POINT shots in an NBA finals series. How many? I’ve lost count so you better google it. XD

THE COACH. He looks stern and creepy on the court but there’s something in him which tells me he has also developed emotional attachment to his players. I really look up to the oldest coach in the NBA series for 2013. :’) Let the photo speak for itself.

Look, two days from now, it’s gonna be game 7 and whether or not they win, this remarkable team has already shown more than enough, to make them worthy of the NBA title. I am now a certified solid Spurs fan! YEA! XD

I’ve missed hours in reviewing. Screw me. But no regrets. They inspired me to win my own version of “NBA finals” this year, and I sincerely hope I’ll play as good as this team did. They gave it their all. I’ve learned a lot form them. :) 

At the SPUR of the moment, the curse of the black SPURS has gotten into me and I’ve no plan to get rid of it. :’)

Review Curiosity

I “love” movies. What I usually think is that they help me drift away from reality, but what actually happens is that movies depict a fun and exciting perspective of how I ought to see life as it is. I love stories, most especially stories I can relate myself with. I am very emotional. Whenever a movie captures my heart, I cannot easily get over with it, it will take the entire night or the next day for me to move on and realize that it was “just” a movie.

It was Maundy Thursday and the family tradition during the Holy Week was to watch movies. This has been one of the many reasons why I look forward to the Lent season (HAHA). I really love seeing my mom and dad and my sister stare seriously at the TV screen, then smile and laugh and look sad altogether. :’) mem’ries. Geeeezz, not again. Okay, so this year, we spent Thursday at home, as usual, and me and my sister had the time of our lives, trying to kill each other to win the remote control. :D  I also made time to update my blog and then I skipped siesta for the time being.

In the evening, we decided to go to Church and observe the Eastern vigil (for a while, so not technically a vigil) and man, the aura was just so peaceful. There were candles, and plants and colored lights, and all else that the 21^st century can offer. I found a good place to reflect and pray. ^.^

This was kinda' how it looked like but it's way better seen actually. :)

After that, we left for home and tuned in for the television. My mom is the type of the person who’s really into Tagalog love movies (which I usually find baduy) and so we had to bear watching the replay of Sarah Geronimo and John Lloyd Cruz’s (insert title here). When mom switched channels during advertisements, I caught a scene in one movie I saw before. It was not long ago when I caught boredom watching “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” and believe me, I felt more excited watching boredom in front of me that to stick to this “hopeless-case-for-me” tagalong movie mom’s so serious about.

FINALLY, the remote control fell into the powerful and kilig-defying hands of mine! MWAHAHAHA! XD The three of them went to sleep already so I then owned the TV powers! (MWAHAHAHAHAHA!) Okay now, serious mode. As what I said, I already saw the movie, and the impression I got was that it was a sad love story, so what I was really up to that evening was to grasp some details of the movie which I did not retain or even understand, and to hope that perhaps, it may change even just a small aspect of me, as a person, capable of loving and living a good life. And it did.

I do not intend to write a narrative of the movie because trust me, it’s better seen that told.  :) Anyhow, I’ll write about the major lessons I learned and the very reasons why I finally cried hard in front of the television again since I can’t remember. Like SRSLY, even after turning off the TV and the lights, I still found myself crying to sleep, and I felt so moved that even when I woke up the next day (Good Friday), I still cried like crazy. OOHHHH, SEE?! I was deeply moved that I believe this movie deserves a movie review (sort of) in my blog. Not that Brad Pitt is undeniably handsome and gorgeous, don’t get me wrong please, but if Benjamin Button is actually a non-fictional character, I will really do my best to meet him one day, and it would be such a privilege to be able to speak to a virtuous man, with a peculiar case and a big heart. I’m afraid it was mistake to have taken the movie as a sad love story, it was way more than that. Much more than that. <3

It was a story of life, and of time, entirely. It was about failure, heartbreak, love, trying, and understanding that fact that nothing lasts forever, but some things are just never meant to be forgotten. It is a story of bearing with life patiently, a story of acceptance, of forgiveness and of starting all over. Benjamin is someone who grows backwards, and I admire him for being a good man at that, despite of how painful it was to watch everyone else die old ahead of him, while he grows younger, ALONE. I found it really cute when he was around 10 (I guess) and he had to lie when asked about the last time he had sex with a woman. He looked old, but you can feel that his heart was young, his eyes spoke much more than the words which came out from his lips. Moreover, I also admired the way he accepted Daisy, despite of her, rejecting him not just once, but many times, and loving her despite of her wild sex life with other men her age and for being patient enough to understand her during the process of her adulthood, despite the fact that he should also be understood, as someone growing older, yet younger. Complicated indeed.

All along, I thought that the worst thing that Benjamin ever did was to leave Daisy a year after giving birth to their daughter. But after watching the movie, the second time, I was convinced that it was the bravest and the hardest thing he ever did in his life. He had to leave, and, I admire him again for that.

What really made me cry like a dying pig was when their daughter Caroline, found out about the truth (she grew up loving a different man as her father) and read every postcard Benjamin has sent for her every birthday she celebrated. The words were just so piercing that even now, I’m about to cry na naman ulit. T T HAHA. :3

He told her how he wished to be the father who sent her to school in her 1^st grade, the father who could have been her crying shoulder during her teenage years whenever a boy would make her cry, he told her about….ahh, I just can’t do this. (haha, my gosh, super drama mode na jud) I’m really sorry, this is just how I get hooked with a movie. I deliberately and emotionally get HOOKED. So let me just quote the beautiful lines in the movie:

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.” 
― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay

“You can be as mad as a mad dog at the way things went, you can curse the fates, but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” 
― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay

“Life can only be understood looking backward.  It must be lived forward.” 

“It’s not about how well you play.  It’s how you feel about what you’re playing.”

“Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss.” 
― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay

"And I think, right there and then, she realized none of us is perfect forever."

"Some people, were born to sit by a river. Some get struck by lightning. Some have an ear for music. Some are artists. Some swim. Some know buttons. Some know Shakespeare. Some are mothers. And some people, dance."

And the sweetest way they say this is at night, when they are worlds apart:

Benjamin Button: Goodnight Daisy.  

Daisy: Goodnight Benjamin.

You better watch the movies guys, if you haven't yet. I’m getting the feeling that I'm spoiling it badly. ^.*

No wonder the film won numerous awards internationally. No wonder it made me cry dearly. No wonder, that by now, I am very much enthused to share it with you. And I will not ever wonder, why someday and somehow, you will also feel uplifted and inspired by the movie. Don’t just keep breathing. Keep on living. And don’t just live. Live well.

Let me share to you one of the most profound lines in the movie, spoken by an old man who was hit by lightning seven times (HAHAHAHAHA!) but never felt disheartened and I quote;

“The truth is, despite of everything, God keeps on reminding me that I'm lucky to be alive, and that is what’s important.” <3

Making it Up

I haven't been completely honest to you my dear blog, so I made it a point to have this entry so you'd not feel bad. NAKS. <3

Well, for the record, this will be the first entry with super few words and a whole lot of photos. Perhaps they'll do to compensate for the details I can no longer write. You know, I have this memory problem (which I have to deal with so it won't get in the way with my review). :'( Any how, let's get going:

STRESSPOINT

I'd be showing you pictures of how glorious I was before, like yea. How stressed I was (take note of the eye bags) but how beautifully I smile as well. HAHA. As I told you, my course is a great challenge so here goes the stressful moments:

Perhaps this was the morning after a harsh Friday or a Sunday morning before a heavy Monday. Galit-sa-mundo look. Wai ligo. Sabog face. K. >.<

Okay, so this one looks better. Only that I look like a total swell. Geeeezz.

Before I forget, I'm the type who goes for a snapshot every now and then when the topic I'm delving myself into gets a little bit hard or worse, boring. CHEESE! :D

My favorite snack and the thickest eye bags I ever had in the history of my college life. :3

So this was what I really loved about the Midterm exams during my last semester in college because my hair was perfect like MAGIC! And I was less stressed. Dunno why. LOL XD

Okay, so this one's during the finals week. The mini pimples in the forehead just showed up like aloha! I can't blame myself. The heat was on and my heart and mind was like: I HAVE TO GUARANTEE MYSELF A SEAT ON THE GRADUATION DAY! :")

Okay. The triple proof of my damsel-in-distress look during the finals week. I had this habit of curling my hair with my pen when I solve problems in MAS ans in Audit Problems. See the poor eyes. :(

During the most excruciating day in March while I was waiting outside the faculty room for the verdict of my Government Accounting grade. I suppose you can see the stress all over my face. :P

BREAK

So here I come during weekends when I feel like having a break:

Well, during those times that I stay at home, I just chill out and eat my favorite ready-to-cook pancit canton topped with rice. Ang weird no? Nahuli yung rice! <3

I haven't been too public about this but I entertain pictorial sessions with crazy friends! This was with Katrina, Venus and Leilani at SM CDO. :*

In case you forget, I'm super into french tips, so this was one variation I did due to boredom. ^.^

One of the proofs of the tiny-sweet-nothings that my little sister does everytime I study. There are times that it's super nakakainis na talaga, but more often than not, I get to realize that I have to take breaks and jump into the kiddy side of me. :)

We're talking about breaks right? So there's always food. :D This was during my 20th birthday when dad stole a piece of my time to dine at TokyoTokyo hours before my MAS midterm exam. :)

Who dare miss vanity sessions? o.O Me? Of course not. 

This was during the 2nd day of the grand opening of Ayala's centrio Mall at the heart of CDO. I so love our family pic printed right away! (which is not available so bear with this na lang.)

I also had time to visit my tita Flery's hub and never missed to have vanity sessions with her! I like their place, it's like a movie house. Cool TV screen and sofa! <3

Taken right before my thesis defense. Quick break. ^.*

The last Christmas party that I  had as an SM scholar. I am so gonna miss these beautiful and great people! They inspired me in ways I never thought they will. :')

After the yearbook pictorial. What more can I say? I love ze hair! <3

My look for the seniors' night. :>

If you happen to wonder, what perfect present/surprise to give me in terms of food, GIGA FRENCH FIRES in cheese or barbecue from potato corner will do. Satisfaction guaranteed! :D

AFTERMATH

Glory days right after my last semester in college. <3

To start with, let the chocolatey merienda with Fr. Bobby do the talking. (oh, we had Magnum, a bit of lumpia, and an elegant pasta with this. YUM!)

And then I had this Mutya Orquia-inspired look. :*

This is me with my bestie Kyle, having a snack at breadtalk. <3

These are my officemates co-auditors doing the XU-CSG Commission on Audit year-end audit. These people were much cooler than I thought they were. Auditing is definitely NOT boring as long as you have fun and crazy people to be with! :D

With my little sister during the SBM Recognition night. (I was so under-dressed! Urgh!) >.<

My super delicious grad cake courtesy of chocolates and creams! YUM! :)

It's Percival in the house, singing his heart out (just days after his break-up). Tsk. </3

My bestie and hair-twin! <3

With my ninang Fe and my brilliant kababata Donna Marie :D

__________________________________________________

and finally, my most recent experiment during the Holy Week:

My face with honey and cinnamon. BLAST! HAHA! ;)

TOODLES! :*

Lies

Good or bad, it's still a lie and nothing can keep you from paying for it later on. In one way or another.

Today was splendid. I finally had a good long nap and I was able to watch Monte Carlo once more. Eventually, it was also my first time to see an episode of "Person of Interest." Too bad, I won't be able to catch up on it anymore.

I learned so much about TRUTH with both of those movies and I guess the sense of sin in me really matters. I posted something on facebook and twitter today. A friend of mine noticed and I don't know what to say so I logged out. Sad. I should be careful about everything that I do next time. I don't want lies. Trust me, I've been extending much effort lately to avoid lying. I hate the pain inside, that ugly feeling within after depriving people of the truth they deserve.

This break can't get any worse. I cried too much on the first week. Conscience stroke me too hard the second week and on the third week; BOOM! I expect killer grades! HAHA. Mind if you insert sarcasm over here?!

I love this life. Seriously. I'm learning. And I hope, at the very bottom of my heart that I'd be able to act on my learnings. 'Til then. :')

The Prologue

“Some people see things as they are and ask; why? Other people see things that never were and ask, why not?”- Robert F. Kennedy

I honestly find it hard to recall the first time I grasped the notion of love. Surely, it had to be somewhere during my childhood years though. Those were the days when I see mom and dad hold hands and kiss each other’s cheek, those were the times when I cry out loud and granny wipes away my tears with her loose blouse and those were the moments when my best friend would share to me her last few pieces of chicheria because she knows it’s also my favorite snack. Barely, that was twelve years ago. Twelve years.

Here comes change. Strange isn’t it? That moment when your seatmate teases you to that heartthrob cutie everyone’s eyeing at way back in grade school. It’s undeniable that “that teasing part” makes you smile. AAAHH. Perhaps, that was the time I had the slightest notion of a crush. Since then, the innocence started to fade out and everything went pitch-black. You tend to feel that giggling sensation deep inside when he brushes off his cool butterfly hairstyle with his hands and gives out that killer smile. Those were the times when hairclips, a new pink bag and a shiny pair of shoes were my crowning glory. They made me feel that I actually had a chance of the possibility of him, liking me back. So young at that, when someone actually made me someone I’m not.

Let’s not forget this part: that time of your life when that ‘he’ happens to have a crush on that ‘she’ who apparently plays the role of being your best friend. Heck yes. It was in grade school when I had to deal with seeing them slip into each other’s bag SOME CUTE LOVE LETTERS. Sounds unfair, and I actually wanted to play the part of the contrabida you know. [-] This close, yes, that close! HAHA! It sounds unfair really, you know, she’s supposed to have love letters from you on Valentine’s day as her best friend, but now she actually enjoys having one every single day and the worst part is, it’s from him. Your crush. Tsk, tsk.

Okay. So much for this puppy love heart-breaking chapter, let’s talk about high school. Old school. Oh well, in my case, at least. This part reminds me of Taylor Swift’s FIFTEEN. Was it just me? Or did cupid find me very unworthy of his arrow? Let’s put it this way: a girl like me experienced four sadly ever afters aside from burning my midnight torches for physics, zoology, lab reports for biology and a whole lot of mind-boggling exercises in calculus. Let’s start with the not-so-ouchy-part. I had a crush on someone who had to leave school for health reasons. He played the guitar so well. So sad. We could’ve made a perfect band. (LOL) Then, I had a crush on someone even if I knew he was courting the hottest student in school. And yes, even if he got dumped, I still didn’t get the chance to take over the spotlight. Very heart-breaking. Go on, keep waiting at the school lobby for him to pass by. (sigh) The next outcome was when I had a crush on that guy who ‘periodically’ texted me and made me feel I was cool. Unfortunately, I woke up one day, and saw him carry someone else’s kikay bag. Right, they’re together now. So much for my happy ending. SO SAD PART 3. Finally….I finally believed this guy’s the one. He goes to my school with some support group (HAHA.) and he gets to say his part of the speech and actually made me and my friends believe he’s dead serious and BOOM! Just before I could officially say I’m now his “girlfriend” one FINE day, those same friends of mine whom he actually talked to; saw him smooching with someone in public. Oh well, this can’t get any worse, can it?

So, the unfortunate turn of events made me cry out: WHAT GRUESOME AND HORRENDOUS SORCERRY IS THIS?! While everyone has already gotten their fair share of romantic dance during the junior prom, why do I find myself pretending to eat on the dining table so that I won’t get jealous of my friends having the time of their lives! WHERE HAVE YOU GONE, MY KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR?!

I know you actually heard of the “payback time” part when the lead actress gets to have a taste of some accomplishments in life and they somehow made her believe that maybe in college, perhaps in college, the overrated lipstick, eye-liner and pressed powder would actually make her look more human. I got through that as well. Positive reinforcement. At least.

HIHI. I don’t actually want to elaborate more of this part. HAHA. It really makes me laugh to recall the kind of love story God wrote for me for two years in college. Fine. I was, for the first time, happy. Crossroads really make sense. A whole lot of sense actually. I experienced butterflies in my stomach on my first date with mom and dad’s license, late night calls, and all that. The weird thing is, both of you don’t actually talk in class. LITERALLY, like you didn’t exist. Then a simple complication, miscommunication leads to fall out. So many things that I wish you knew but the story of us might be ending soooooon…wait, is that a song? Nevermind. HAHA! To cut it short, we both screwed up and it didn’t work out. End. ;)

Very well then, I promised myself to never ever get vulnerable to these stupid emotions. I drowned myself with a nightmare of accounting problems and yes, they actually got me through! But then, I’m just human you know, so I accidentally fell for this young and (HAHAHAHAHA) teacher. Wait, I can’t spill it here. Just so you’d know, I always made it a point to pass by his office and check if the teacher next to his cubicle is beautiful or not. I also made it an effort to pass by his 7pm class VERY SLOWLY, like that slow motion effect you see on movies. Silly. But then the attraction actually faded. Just like that.

Well, this part of the sharing is overkill already. Let’s just move forward to the main event. For the first time, I actually had a crush on an innocent mind! (insert witch-like laughter here). He’s a junior by the way. I tampered an organizational file just to have a 1x1 photo of him. OKAYFINE. Call me whatever. It’s done already. Deal with it. XD I can’t explain it but I’m glad I feel normal again. I mean, the usual routine of stalking! I know, you’re now telling me that THIS ISN’T GONNA WORK OUT FOR THE NTH TIME, BUT WHO CARES?! I’M ALIVE AND I’M ENTITLED TO THIS….THIS WHATEVER YOU CALL IT! :D

Maybe, there isn’t a guy in the universe meant for me. The possibility of being a nun actually crossed my mind once. Fine. So much for the blah blah. On the other hand, perhaps THERE IS actually a guy destined for me. Aside from being a crybaby, there’s gotta be a reason why old songs still knock me off my feet every time I listen to them just before I sleep. Maybe there’s a reason why I still get to wipe tears on my cheeks when I talk to God about the right guy, at the right place, at the right time. Maybe, just maybe, these will all make sense after all.

When you love, you don’t have to make the person fall for you so you’d completely experience love. I’d be a hypocrite if I’ll deny that I NEVER hoped he’d like me back, but then, you see, as what I have learned in my philosophy class, the beauty of love is in the loving in itself, not the love given in return. Had I known this fact long before, cursing cupid wouldn’t have been one of my favorite pass times. (just kidding. Cupid looks hot by the way, based on how he was described in Edith Hamilton’s book). I should have felt more deeply the simple joy it gave me, even if I know for a fact that he won’t notice or admire me, just as how I admire him.

Every little girl dreamt of her own prince charming right after that Disney movie flashed “the end” on the screen. Every teenage soul hoped for the perfect guy who would actually sing to her that mp3 song she’s been dying to play for more than a week. Every lady had her greatest hopes for the right man whom her children will call “father” someday. A friend of mine said that choosing the right man would be the very first gift she could give to her future kids, just before they are born.

I didn’t have a solo walk for having no boyfriend since birth for almost 2 decades now. And yes, girls like us still exist. Girls like us are actually willing to keep our eyes open so we’ll see the right guy fall right in front of our doorstep. (But for the meantime, we sure can make exemptions to take a short peek at those pretty faces that pass by our window once in a while. HAHA!)

Every girl has her own story to tell. Mine has just begun. ♥